Samo za C programere i molekularne biologe

Mensi (mensur@mensur.med.unr.edu)
Tue, 23 Jan 1996 13:20:35 -0800

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For many years molecular biologists have been mystified by the fact that
very little of an organism's DNA seems to serve any useful function.

I have solved the mystery.

The reason why only 30% of human DNA performs any useful function is
that the rest of it is comments.

Once we decode a typical human genome, we see that the contents begin as
follows:

===
/* HUMAN_DNA.H
*
* Human Genome
* Version 2.1
*
* (C) God
*/

/* Revision history:
*
* 0000-00-01 00:00 1.0 Adam.
* 0000-00-02 10:00 1.1 Eve.
* 0000-00-03 02:11 1.2 Added penis code to male version. A bit messy --
* will require a rewrite later on to make it neater.
* 0017-03-12 03:14 1.3 Added extra sex drive to male.h; took code from
* elephant-dna.c
* 0145-10-03 16:33 1.4 Removed tail.
* 1115-00-31 17:20 1.5 Shortened forearms, expanded brain case.
* 2091-08-20 13:56 1.6 Opposable thumbs added to hand() routine.
* 2501-04-09 14:04 1.7 Minor cosmetic improvements -- skin colour made
* darker to match my own image.
* 2909-07-12 02:21 1.8 Dentition inadequate; added extra 'wisdom' teeth.
* Must remember to make mouth bigger to compensate.
* 4501-12-31 14:18 1.9 Increase average height.
* 5533-02-12 17:09 2.0 Added gay option, triggered by high population
* density, to try and slow the overpopulation problem.
* 6004-11-04 16:11 2.1 Made forefinger narrower to fit hole in centre of
* CD.
*/

/* Standard definitions
*/

#define SEX male
#define HEIGHT 1.84
#define MASS 68
#define RACE caucasian

/* Include inherited traits from parent DNA files.
*
* Files must be pre-processed with MENDEL program to provide proper
* inheritance features.
*/

#include "mother.h"
#include "father.h"

#ifndef FATHER
#warn("Father unknown -- guessing\n")
#include "bastard.h"
#endif

/* Set up sex-specific functions and variables
*/
#include <sex.h

/* Kludged code -- I'll re-design this lot and re-write it as a proper
* library sometime soon.
*/
struct genitals
{
#ifdef MALE
Penis *jt;
#endif

#ifdef FEMALE
/* G_spot *g; Removed for debugging purposes */
Vagina *p;
#endif
}

/* Initialization bootstrap routine -- called before DNA duplication.
* Allocates buffers and sets up protein file pointers
*/
DNA *zygote_initialize(Sperm *, Ovum *);

/* MAIN INITIALIZATION CODE
*
* Returns structures containing pre-processed phenotypes for the organism
* to display at birth.
*
* Will be improved later to make output less ugly.
*/
Characteristic *lookup_phenotype(Identifier *i);
===

..and so on.

[ Note that God programs in C, uses three-space tabs and /* */ style
comments ]

C------W DDDDDDDDD NNN NNN AAAAAAA C------W
C--------W DDD DDDD NNNN NNN AAA AAA C--------W
C--------W DDD DDD NNNNN NNN AAA AAA C--------W
C-------W DDD DDD NNN NN NNN AAAAAAAAA C-------W
C----W DDD DDD NNN NNNNN AAA AAA C----W
W DDD DDDD NNN NNNN AAA AAA W
W--C DDDDDDDDD NNN NNN AAA AAA W--C
W-----C W-----C
W--------C Mensur Dlakic W--------C
W---------C Department of Biochemistry/330 W---------C
W--------C University of Nevada, Reno W--------C
W-----C Reno, Nevada 89557 W-----C
C http://www.med.unr.edu/homepage/mdlakic/index.html C
C--W C--W
C------W e-mail: mensi@scs.unr.edu C------W
C--------W dlakic@icgeb.trieste.it C--------W
C--------W C--------W